Here it is. The humble Ash plectrum. View its splendour. Note the strange monogram: Jim Dunlop. For you see, that’s Tim Wheeler’s new stage name…it’s just the plectrums arrived before the paperwork was finished.
“Here! You in the glasses! Giz a plectrum! Set list! Drum stick! Fuckin anything!”
I see you…standing apart from those other HUNDREDS of people…those who came, enjoyed the show, and left. Those people are suckers. Not you. You deserve more. You know what it takes to win…how to procure your free gig souvenir, that little something extra you are so rightly entitled to…just hang around the stage like a starving prisoner of war.
But seriously…these are bog-standard, get ’em anywhere plectrums/plectra/picks. By getting your hands on one of these little babies you are adding absolutely nothing to any collection.
So unless you’re around ten years old, stop asking for plectrums. Yes…I am a miserable git. Besides…you and I both know…if I give you one of these, you’re only going to lose it on the way home.
Leif Bodnarchuk 
Awww. Give ’em a plectrum.